Just thought I'd add this....

It's something I wrote on another site about how I eat when I'm feeling lonely or depressed. Check it out if you want.
http://www.experienceproject.com/uw.php?e=821467

Not a Good Start

Six days since I've written anything new, already not off to a good start. I promise once my school finales are over I'll be writing at least every two days.

So far I have come to the conclusion that the road to the perfect body starts with confronting the imperfections here. Hopefully the public humilliation of it will force me to change. It most likely won't be posted till after December 15, the offical end of my finals, but I'll post my current wieght, hight, body mass index, and pictures of myself. It will be constantly updated for a year. In one year I hope to get down to my goal wieght.

I still need help perfecting a diet and exercise plan so that'll take me awhile to gid into. Wish me luck.

Do you know what comes up when you type the word "perfect" into Google search? The drop down suggestion list number one search as "perfect body". Do you know what images come up in that search? Ones like this ----->

I was always told that you can obtain a body like that with good 'ol diet and exercise. Well, I exercised in high school and elementary/middle school and my diet was always decided by my parents, what they ate I ate.

I don't have a body like that. I know diet and exercise will help and I have tried but like everything else in my life I failed at it. So maybe that's why I'm doing this. So that someone can help me, can push me, can do this with me so I don't feel alone and so that I can turn to someone when I feel I'm failing again.

I want that perfect body. But I can't do it alone. I need help, advise, tips. I'm at the point where I will do anything to look like that. If there is someone out there who can help me please, I'm begging you, help me. I don't have the money to join a gym, actually I was part of one and had to quit because I lost my job and can't afford it. I am so sick of being the fat one that is both ignored and gawked at. I'm sick of not being as attractive as my friends. I'm sick of spending hours at malls not finding anything that fits my fat ass. I just want, for once in my life, to be like every other girl. I want to be pretty, I want to be skinny, I want to be perfect.